alternate reality

this
is
not
really
happening

i never was a
simple girl

layers of fabric
charity shop binges
of leopard print
and kitsch

peel them away,
it's funny,
but i think "please,
don't rip them
from my flesh"

what if I'm not the
good girl
in all of this

they say that
things change
people
and that
love's not
some solid
construction made
of steel

you
have
to
make
it
work

sometimes it hurts
like hell

years go by
and i don't drink
until someone passes
me a glass and
i choke on a
fluid memory

that
sticks
to
nothing

so many dreams
dissolved
into sweat
on your chest
where that
my heart is sometimes found...